Square Peg

Disclaimer: This transcript is AI generated and may be incorrect.
Ronnie: 
Hello and welcome to Yep! A King of the Hill podcast for decent women. I'm Ronnie.
Rob: 
And I'm Rob. Today we're talking about Season 1, Episode 2, Square Peg.
KOTH CLIP: 
Dad? Do you ever have sex anymore?
KOTH CLIP: 
Well, uh... Come on, Bobby. Can't you think of something pleasant?
Ronnie: 
Such an honest question. In this episode, Peggy has chosen to be the sex education teacher at Bobby's school. Rob, what are your thoughts and your history with this episode?
Rob: 
The episode's incredible. It's so fun. And it's about a fun subject. And I did a podcast about it one time years and years ago with a different dude, our mutual friend. You know, that's part of why I like talking about shows on podcasts is because it just stuck with me for a year, you know, half a decade. I'm like, man, that sex education episode of King of the Hill is fucking great. Because when you talk about it on a podcast, you got to pay attention and celebrate it with someone else. and it just sticks with you. That's some of the best of what can go on when you're doing this kind of thing. So yeah, I love it. Full disclosure to our listeners here, we're just gonna recreate the episode that you did previously. So I'll read in the other part and we're just gonna read everything verbatim. You went practicing all morning during your basketball game there. I was distracted is why I couldn't guard.
Ronnie: 
Well, hey, in Square Peg here, I mean, it's episode two. They're coming out swinging with a hot topic on this one. But that's right. The joke here isn't about sex, right? Like, this isn't like a dirty episode. It's really about a lot of the characters' uncomfortability around it in the case of the adults and the ignorance around it, I guess, also in the case of the adults, but more so with like Bobby. Like, he just doesn't know really a lot about it, as we'll see. Hey, it's Rodney stopping in to say thanks so much for listening to Yep. As you know, Rob and I, we are pump jockeys, and, well... Yupp is a fortnightly show, which means we release every other Monday, but if there was enough support, we would love to go weekly. If you choose to support the show at five bucks a month, you get the full episode. This week for Square Peg, that includes over 35 minutes of Rob and I talking about stuff that you're not going to get here. That includes a pesky newcomer to his pickup basketball game, the 1997 Golden Globes and how friends got snubbed, as well as an episode appropriate song from Genuine.
Rob: 
Oh, the Hot 100. Number one is still Unbreak My Heart. Great song. I looked through the Well, listen, talking about Ashley Judd and that Marilyn Monroe biopic. We're talking about, is it Kristen Scott Thomas getting naked and the English patient? You know, I'm a horny teenage boy.
Ronnie: 
-
Rob: 
It's a real sex beat right there. My saddle's waiting, coming.
Ronnie: 
I'll have to keep that line Fuck it. Baby.
Rob: 
Sweetie, my saddle's
Ronnie: 
It's waiting. It's so sexy. Deni line.
Rob: 
- Away with words. - Yeah, by the way, I'm like, - Yeah. We're really like talking it up. - I don't know. - We're being really nice to it, yeah. - It's talking about sex, and there's something about the music like you know like I don't know you like rhythmic yeah this song I
Ronnie: 
This song has like a rhythm. Yeah. Yeah. Genuine really invented that. That whole concept of, I guess we'll see who's better at discussing sex issues. Um, we record this all in one go so things that we talk about in these supporter only sections do find their way into the king of the hill part we'll do our best here to let you know what those things are because we're not trying to leave any of the free listeners in the dark that is not our intention but if you would like to see the light you can head on over to yet podcast.com support or check the link in the description again thank you so much for listening let's go get ourselves a sexual education, huh? Square Peg, no cold open in this one. Unlike Pilot, we just opened in on the intro song here. That'll be standard, right? We do get cold opens from time to time. There's no one or the other. They kind of oscillate between the two. But here in episode two, we get to spend more time with Peggy. Because in Pilot, as you said, she's kind of just this motherly figure. And that's really all we see of her. So we learn more about her in this one, which is nice.
Rob: 
I just thought, "Life don't get much better than this." - Life don't get much better than this, man. - Hold on, I gotta play it right, or I gotta play my part, where I look at you like you're a fucker. Pull the old tugboat move. looking at you like, you just confused him so bad he might have
Ronnie: 
Murder you. That boy. Right. First of all, we open it, we see Peggy. She is in her office, which is actually like the, what's the name for that? Like a utility closet. Yeah. It's got the water heater. We also see she has a trophy, substitute teacher of the year, 1996. She's in the office. Like you said, she's grading a paper and she's just kind of sitting there looking at it. And then she just gives it a B.
Rob: 
that excruciating is peggy onto something here well you know who knows what what all she's done leading up to that moment right because if it's me i've i've read the essay along the way and i'm working on a computer so i've like highlighted certain stuff in the program that our university uses you can color code that highlighting so i have stuff for like structure stuff for development stuff for style like a color for those things and then i go back and fill in those comments right i developing in my mind what the it is ultimately kind of like But I don't like a rubric. I think they're reductive and kind of dumb and useless to me. So yeah, I don't know. You know, you read the essay, you think through its strengths and weaknesses. This is like the most boring explanation. I took you literally and I'm just explaining how you actually grade essays. I fucking forgot to be entertaining. This is what, and then- You thought you were in like a teacher. Then what you do is, so you play back that audio of me explaining that process 100 times
Ronnie: 
in a row. And that's what I do for a living. Oh my God. Well, yeah, I guess I don't blame Peggy here. She's got to get through them. I do want to say the paper is dated December 19th, 1996. So we are somewhere within that time span, which I mean, Christmas would be coming up in six days. I don't know if this is supposed to be around Christmas, if this is past Christmas. I don't. what that situation is here. So what happens is Hank's calling for her because he's hurt his back. And that's why she's like, you know, I'm in my office. I'm over here. So she has to leave after she gives the paper a B. She has to leave. And Hank wants some icy hot on his back. And so, you know, Hank takes his shirt off. She
KOTH CLIP: 
- Hot.
Ronnie: 
But then Bobby comes in and sees his dad without his shirt on. Love that. They established that here in the second episode. I don't think that we see him in pilot with his shirt off. But yeah, like he always has, almost all the guys have tan lines on the show. "Lies, bouncing." Like, he's talking to about the dog or something, like O-U-T or whatever yeah like Bobby can't spell boy I love that
Rob: 
You know, at this point, you don't know what the episode about even the title wouldn't tip you off yeah square peg yeah you're not gonna know so getting again that like letting who these characters are and what story you're telling emerge as things play out real organically like it just plays as a joke that hank is so uncomfortable having his wife in front of their son, and it turns out is the driving force
Ronnie: 
well-made show did you know i never i never knew that i never knew it was a well-made show no but i mean truthfully you're right i didn't even connect those dots until you just said that yeah that we're seeing it off the bat with hank right there that that is foreshadowing what's about to come next yeah like he's so shy of intimacy really in any form and that is something that does come up throughout king of the hill like they do address that from time to time it is hanks Even in his own home with his wife, he is scared of that. So Bobby comes in. The reason he's coming in here is because he has a permission slip for sex ed and Hank I was not thrilled about this. - I need both of you to sign this permission slip. - Alrighty, what's it for, son?
KOTH CLIP: 
No, you're not old enough for that. Ringworm test? What? Sexual education? Where'd you get this?
KOTH CLIP: 
I told you at school. Oh, I thought we didn't have to worry about this until 9th grade health class. Nuh-uh. Principal wants to teach
Ronnie: 
a unit from some course they made up in Washington, D.C. Washington? Bobby, go to your room. He is not. Washington. He is not pleased to be.
Rob: 
- Go to your room. - And yeah, he sends Bobby to his room. - Yeah, so once Bobby does leave, Hank is basically complaining to Peggy about how it's not the government's job to do all that kind of stuff. No need for Bobby to get all...
KOTH CLIP: 
learning about sex when he can't do a damn thing about it anyway at his age. And with his features. Holy God, and with his features.
Ronnie: 
funniest thing yeah it's i mean bobby's supposed to be 11 here i believe and you know they say later is fifth grade. That's young. That's young right? So I remember when I was in fifth grade we had like a kind of like a puberty lesson like we had to watch. It wasn't sex ed though.
Rob: 
That's what I remember anyways. - I remember Sex Ed specifically being
Ronnie: 
grade. Yeah, for me too. Yeah, that's when they tried to explain it. I don't think... For us, it was like a gym teacher was supposed to teach that to us, and he did not do a good job. Did you separate boys and girls? Yes.
Rob: 
So did we. We separate boys and girls. So the guys went over and this guy was not one of my regular teachers. He was my friend's regular teacher, Coach Powell, who had fucking guns, man. Spell that. Is that P-O-W? Coach Powell? Powell. Oh, Coach Powell. He like fucking pulls the arm out. Well, he was. He was the jacked one. you know, like now I'd be like, dude, lean down a little bit. But we were like, man, that guy's so, I got body problems and body image problems. But he was, he had big guns and tight shirts that we used to behind his back for sure, make fun of him for having a super tight, you know, district issued polo shirts, that kind of thing with his biceps out. I don't, if he did a good job I do remember that I watched a lady give birth oh my god on a in real life that was your field trip yeah sure on video and I remember being like, holy shit, they're just showing us a fucking vagina? Is that what we're doing? This is a real adult situation here. And then the baby comes out. I wish I could remember more I probably... It's such a heightened experience. You're in seven years, grade you go to a different classroom than normal it's all the dudes mm-hmm and this lunkhead is showing you of ladies. and all kinds of shit talking about probably condoms and dicks and all that. That's a pretty weird thing, right? Like that's not, like we were potty mouthed and talking about God knows what. on our own time, but we're in a classroom? Talking about vaginas and penises? So wait, so this was in... was in Texas. Yeah. Did you have to get both of your parents' signatures on this? Surely not both, but I do. There must have been a permission slip, right? Right. But I don't recall a... It may have happened - Sure. grade boys, All of us. into a classroom, watching a baby come
Ronnie: 
I've still never even seen that, even in a video form, let alone in real life. I mean, you got the internet. I don't know what you're waiting for. I guess that's just my fault at this point. But I mean, I remember my sex ed was not particularly informative. I remember for whatever reason, we watched an episode of that dinosaur show. Holy shit. Really? I don't know why. That's to exemplify how bad this was. I remember, all I remember it was a bunch of one kid who didn't know they got him to ask what is masturbation because he didn't know what that word
Rob: 
Can you imagine when the kid who instigated that found out that that opportunity was
Ronnie: 
Yeah, right. Like, this guy doesn't know.
Rob: 
I don't know how that would come up, but you find out that this kid does not know what masturbation is. You start rubbing your hands together, scheming,
Ronnie: 
a very good time. You need to ask. This is about to be almost as fun as masturbation. Just one rung on the ladder below the actual thing. I don't remember much from it. I just remember it wasn't particularly informative. I just remember it was kind of cool. We got to sit in some room I'd never been in in the school before for a couple days or a day or two. I don't know how long it was, but I remember the science teacher, the biology teacher, she was angry because I think she from watching this episode, I probably knew everything I needed to anyway.
Rob: 
So it's fine. I don't know. I mean, I remember not knowing stuff. That's for sure. I remember me and my buddy, his uncle was a cop from a little town out by Beaumont. But they were in our little town. because it was closer to Houston and they were doing some kind of training, convention, whatever cop thing they were doing. And he had brought a buddy of his, a fellow cop, and we're outside. He's sitting on an overturned bucket. You know, it's Texas. We're out by the barn sitting on buckets. And me and, I'm going to call him Paul, fake name, me and my old buddy, my best friend, we're like, oh, I can't wait to give somebody a blowjob. I just want to give a blowjob. He's like, you want to give a blowjob. Because we didn't know. We thought it was something with sex. I don't know. I want to give a girl a blowjob so bad. guess, that - That was likely after sex ed. I guess you don't explain fellatio to the children. I think I probably came way less informed - Would be come on the streets, you know? - On the buckets. - Oh, speaking of that though. - Yeah. - One time we were hanging out with the girl we loved who didn't give a shit about us. Every now and then she would come out of the house with the neighborhood kids, you know, is like a big thing. sighting or something. like a cute Bigfoot. Cute foot. Like Peggy Hill. Peggy Hill. Somehow 69 came up. This is one of the proudest moments of my life. In the moment, on the spot, had a crush on for who knows, How long? She goes, do you know what 69 is? I figured it out. Oh, I don't know how, how could I possibly, and I did my fingers end to end or whatever, you know, like I did, I 69 my index fingers. I'm like, it's when you, you,
Ronnie: 
You're like Rain Man. I don't know how. That is pretty cool that you figured that out.
Rob: 
- That's not a thing.
Ronnie: 
Put it on my resume and no one gives a fuck. Independently discovered. Well, let's jump back into it here and see what Bobby can figure out, which won't be much. So, Hank, he doesn't like this idea of Bobby having sex at 11, which I guess I get, right? 11, pretty young to be worrying. talk I understand but all those bastards over in Washington they have different ideas Peggy and Hank both agree they're like look the government the school they don't need nothing to do with this the parents are the ones who need to teach their kids now the problem is both of them are very uncomfortable with this topic and neither of them
KOTH CLIP: 
wants to teach it. Well, you're the expert.
KOTH CLIP: 
of the year 1996, as I recall. Oh, Hank, I'm also a decent woman. I got my back out here, Peg. What a chicken shit.
Ronnie: 
just being a baby. And so he'll posture, no, nobody's teaching my son that except for us. Peggy, you go talk to him. You go do it. And she's up for it, which, you know. Reluctantly.
Rob: 
She's uncomfortable, but you do, you know, even going back to Pilot where she kind of helps negotiate the resolution. to the issue between Hank and Bobby, you know, she'll step up for her family and do what needs
Ronnie: 
Well, she'll try. Yeah, as we'll see here, she really tries. So she walks into Bobby's room. Bobby's... this little weirdo He's watching fucking Barney and Friends. Yeah, what the heck? On the TV. He's so like that had to have been. Obviously, it's on purpose because they made the show. but I have to wonder if that was just like to poke fun at Bobby or, or if it's really to exemplify that this is like a kid. what the whole implication here is with Barney and friends kind of weird to me that even at a and he's watching Barney and Friday.
Rob: 
to be watching Barney. - Way too old, yeah. - So I don't know about that. Like why, what do they want us think about that. Peggy comes to
Ronnie: 
Talk to Bobby about sex. Bobby, he has a concern. I'm a little worried about being a slut. Oh my gosh. I just love this episode so much. I love that line because he, you know, she's talking about sex. He delivers that so earnestly. I know. You know, it's funny. It's meant to be funny, but he's not saying it to be funny, this character. He really, he knows being a slut is a bad thing. quote-unquote bad thing, and he doesn't want to be that. And they'll kind of loop back to that towards the end of the episode. But Peggy's there trying to kind of
Rob: 
here with this sex talk with Bobby. - My girls do not have
Ronnie: 
Yeah. You know, some thing. You mean a penis? And she just walks out. She just like goes catatonic. It like zooms in on her face. She's just sitting there like, then she just gets up and silently walks away. So I love it because we're seeing here.
Rob: 
that hank and peggy are so uncomfortable about this but bobby he's like yeah you mean a penis like to him it's like it's not a big deal which also they're uncomfortable i you know i'm probably forgetting maybe some of hank's reactions but here right peggy's not mad at bobby for saying slut or penis she's just overwhelmed by her own shame and discomfort when it comes to sex and i like that like Peggy's a good mom She's doing what she can. It turns out she's got this difficulty, but Bobby is loved. like scolding discomfort out on him or anything like that she just leaves without a word just like i wish we could have stayed with bobby like what the hell what would you think in that situation be like you know did i do something wrong like what's going on here but but you know i guess that communicates something to the kid that they'll absorb you know like oh i say penis and my mom kind of like obviously that affected her you know but anyway
Ronnie: 
Well, we don't stick around with Bobby. We cut outside where Boomhauer is pruning the tree. I believe it's Hank's tree that they are pruning out here, which is... if anybody doesn't know they're cutting the limbs off do you know why they decide How do people decide when, Do you know anything? I don't know. That seems like a grown-up thing. real quick yeah i don't know for whatever reason sometimes trees you got to cut the limbs off that's all that we know boomhower's up there doing it it's a
Rob: 
episode and we again get kind of this running task like you know outdoor real man work that's got to be done around the house. It was the truck and pilot, now they're pruning this tree, because this comes back a few times. I don't know if that'll continue. Right. Well, I think when we go out there, though, because, you know, Boomhauer is pruning this tree, but I believe Bill has the first line. He says, I didn't take sex ed in school. Come on, Boomhauer. If you're going to prune, prune. The army taught me everything. And in four different languages, too. Want to know how to get a bar girl in the Philippines? He's kind of just talking to himself, you know, like he kind of wanders off talking out and thinking out loud about his own sexual education. Nobody's really engaging with it.
Ronnie: 
bureaucrat regulatory handbook. It's not anybody in- Washington! - job to do anything like that. This guy hates bureaucrats. Mm-hmm. They land on like tear that permission slip up this isn't something that we support uh dale goes on about some conspiracy theories about like it's like population control this sex ed stuff goes higher than the schools it's that same
KOTH CLIP: 
Clubberone Zero Podcast.
Ronnie: 
bull dink that the UN's been trying for years. Obviously not a thing, but hey, here in 2020, birth rates are down yeah i don't want to say globally but in many countries yeah i don't know about globally uh
Rob: 
But so now the conspiracy that I see go around is the most powerful people want to get those birth rates up so that they have more grist for the capitalist mill. Exactly. So the conspiracies are moving in the other direction now. Regardless, though, we learn how Hank learned about sex education. We get a flashback of him when he's little with his father, Cotton. And that's how we meet Cotton. You know, like back in Pilot, we saw him.
Ronnie: 
like a kind of like a flashback. And then here, So it's kind of cool that we meet Cotton in these flashbacks. We know who he is before we ever really see him in an episode proper. Is there any indication whether they intended for Cotton to still be around and to come around? eventually? I don't know. I don't, yeah, I don't know if, yeah, right. If that was a planned thing or if it was just a character they meant to have in flashbacks. I'm not sure. I'll have to look into that. I mean, he's such a character. Oh, God, yeah. You must have known that you'd want to use him. Sure. So, yeah, we see how Hank learned about sex ed, and we have a flashback to...
Rob: 
and we see a bull mounting a cow and that's how poor little Hank learned about it. He's there, Hank is crying while Cotton is hooting and hollering because this is good stuff for him and Hank is And then we come back to the present with...
KOTH CLIP: 
That's also how he taught me about paying taxes. So we're more anti-government.
Rob: 
Yeah, yeah, yeah. You just imagine, I've never tried to do a cotton, you know, but you can just imagine it and be like, "The government is like a big bull."
Ronnie: 
You're right, no, because I never thought about what that meant I always took it as like a
Rob: 
absurdist kind of line that didn't make sense. But you're right. That's Uncle Sam right there. Yeah, you can make it work for his perspective. Yeah, yeah. And that is significant, right? We see Hank as a little kid, obviously, I don't want to say being traumatized by this, but he's not happy seeing this. By the way, Cotton, what happens is then the bull inseminates, and then you get a calf, and that's good for everyone. That's how things progress forward.
Ronnie: 
like sustain the lineage right well they didn't stick around the farm long enough to learn that lesson it's just the fucking part right exactly that so again to the fact that hank was messed up by this he didn't like it well now we cut to he's trying to do the same thing with bobby right yeah how about that huh that's kind of a theme throughout this episode is this, I don't want to say generational trauma or anything like that, but like this generational ignorance where initially these characters are continuing on with that trend. And we'll see if they continue on at the end of the episode with it. I think that's life, right? I should probably try to think of some really fun examples or something.
Rob: 
It's pretty common for me to be like, man, I'm just trapped doing the stuff that occurs to me because it's what I've done before. You know, like it's kind of hard to come up with fresh ideas. You know, it's like, I got to figure what to do with this situation and I've seen one example and that's just stuck in my fucking head is the only idea I have. So I guess I'll try it. It is something though that he clear like fucking crying right like he's I'm with you I don't know if I want to say trauma, but it's probably okay.
Ronnie: 
degree. He has an unhealthy relationship with intimacy and sex, so there's something to that, yeah. Yeah, that's right. He's all fucked up. Now let me do this to mom.
Rob: 
Oh, boy. Yeah. You know, you wish that you could maybe get a second opinion or something. You know, well, I guess he goes to the guys, right? They don't, they're not going to help. Right. But we do see now in our next scene, we are at a dairy farm. So Hank is trying to replicate this. However, it's modern times.
Ronnie: 
machine to inseminate the cows. So that's what Bobby has to see. Like, that's supposed to teach him about, you know, tender feelings and things like that. When it's the sterile, very unnatural process that we are seeing.
Rob: 
And the way they do that, right? see that it's in everything and then we just cut to the characters and hank's oh yeah i don't i don't know if he actually does that sound in this case but like we see his reaction and and we can figure out it's same with the bull earlier like we see the mounting and then watch the characters react so fill in the
Ronnie: 
I couldn't help but wonder what, I saw that because Cotton getting young Hank to the farm, I could see that happening, right? I could see maybe Cotton knew the farmer, whatever the situation is. Here, I wish we could have seen, how did Hank get them?
Rob: 
there well i'd like just my boy to see you guys inseminating the like what did that look like why did they even let them in i don't understand completely you almost wonder if if it'd be more realistic if it was some kind of obvious tour that would have been scheduled and they just have people come through and and tour the dairy farm it does make me wonder like to set that up wouldn't hank have to kind of like not tell the whole truth lie a little bit and is that something he would do you can live accordingly because if you "Well, I want to see the bull." And they'd be like, "Oh, we don't do it that way anymore."
Ronnie: 
a trip exactly you're right you're right this is some deep deep king of the hill lore here
Rob: 
around put yourself in bad positions hank's learning a lesson here we smashed to him piecing back together the permission slip yes like that was my one idea to help with that yeah peggy can't talk to him about it yeah hank can't do his fucked up field trip that he wants to do or
Ronnie: 
Yeah, they're literally going through the trash, piecing the note back together. So that Bobby can take sex ed. However, we learned that... But Dale, he took care of it with one simple phone call.
KOTH CLIP: 
Hey Hank, I wouldn't sweat it anymore about that sex ed stuff. What do you mean? All you gotta know is I took care of it with one little phone call. Heh heh.
Ronnie: 
Peggy's inside, Hank comes in He's like, hey Peg Leg And she says, that was Bobby's principal Some right wing maniac called the health teacher With a death threat and she quits Hank looks out the sliding glass door
Rob: 
Where he can see Dale outside. You know, he says something like, oh, I'm sure he's harmless. Because he knows, right? Yeah, he puts it together. Yeah. It makes me wonder what it happens.
Ronnie: 
Did he not even take it seriously? Okay, Dale thinks he took care of it, but he's you know, whatever you're right That's not the thing or did he immediately imagine like all he probably did one of his phone calls? Because I could see this being a regular move on Dale's right like and you said in Pilot we have Anthony page at Dale's house and he's like, you know, you can just you can just move along now so we do see these like moments from Dale where he He does have this side of him and I could see these death threat phone calls
Rob: 
a part of that when he otherwise is a very cowardly kind of person. Right. Yeah. Well, and of course, in this case, well, okay, so with Anthony Page, the CPS guy, it's like, well, he's not a threat. A threat. Yeah. And then he...
Ronnie: 
Well, he's making cowardly. Yeah, it ultimately is cowardly. Right, exactly that. But we do see him in moments thinking that he's this tough, macho, brave guy or what have you.
Rob: 
- On the job. She's like, so they wanted substitute teacher of the year to do it. He goes, substitute teacher 1995? 1996. I like that way of doing it. He's like, ugh. It's not you.
Ronnie: 
Yeah, Hank is not pleased about this. Cut to Peggy studying up. We get a reference to the 80s Oh, I'm sorry, Luanne. I was not paying attention. Listen to this chapter title. The 14 Stages of Arousal. And then you turn the page and... Oh my goodness.
KOTH CLIP: 
Is that C. Everett Coop? That must be an old book. 'Cause now there's
Rob: 
- Oh my. - Somewhere I stumbled across another reference to Coop of the hill I can't even imagine like where I saw that. something but so it makes me think that somebody involved in making the show just It's funny that the guy's name is C. Everett Koop. Yeah. And he's got a beard and no mustache. And that's probably pretty funny. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, you're right. They actually show him in an episode. Oh, they do? Yeah, this season.
Ronnie: 
mentioned again in season So, he's a character that they really, they really - Question for Luann. - Luann, honey, tell me, what is it like to live without shame of any kind? Is it a good feeling? Yeah, it is.
Rob: 
I really like that. I mean, for one thing, if it's anyone else, that's pretty easy to read as It's a backhanded compliment, obviously, right? Like you're asking the question as if it's admirable, right? enviable that she lives without shame. But of course, it sounds bad to live without shame, I guess. I don't think Peggy means Luann obviously doesn't take it that way and it's just kind of fun to see the the way that like Peggy asking a genuine question Kind of like Bobby's genuine conservative. being a slut in this case the way it comes out could be not so great but luckily it's okay and i love that luann contemplates hmm yeah she thinks about it yeah yeah and she's like you know it's pretty good they completely subvert that and it's it's really fun and you're right you know luann takes a second to think i really love that about this show the pacing is so good and it's a slow
Ronnie: 
because of that unnatural to where it's like, okay, you know, these are just lines written on a page that then are being edited very closely together. And it's just like rapid fire back and forth. And surely some shows can kind of do that and pull that off. but to me that turns me off from a lot of cartoons because it just is so unnatural unlike king of the hill here where the characters do take time to think they do take time to to Yeah.
Rob: 
You know, if nothing else, it's just it's a kill. driven story driven show and so we're gonna live in the moments that these characters are experiencing Because that's the story we're telling is, you know, how these people are going through these things.
Ronnie: 
Peggy's reading her book, she does mention the 18 stages of
Rob: 
arousal or something like that? Yeah, arousal. - He mentions whatever number, - That's 18 stages.
Ronnie: 
knows. I tried to Google this. I was like, what? - There are these 18 stages, of course,
Rob: 
I got 18 stages.
Ronnie: 
You want to do this or not? Yeah, it's binary. It's zero or one, on or off. On or off the saddle. I go by the genuine stages of arousal. So I believe here we get a flashback, because we saw how Hank learned about sex ed or whatever, which is, you know, if you want to call it that. And then we saw Peggy, and that was... Peggy is a little girl. Her mom comes to talk to her about, you know, you're going to be getting a monthly visitor soon. Peggy says, who, Uncle Joe? And it's funny because it's so clearly Kathy Najimy's voice just like really pitched up when she's supposed to be a little girl. Oh, yeah. Her mom gives her a book, The Loveliness of Woman. And it's just pictures of flowers. Like there's no information in this book. Like it's nothing.
Rob: 
aren't being actually educated about these things. Was it literally flowers? I assumed it was. I don't know how this would be helpful. And I guess it's not something this parent would share with this child. So I'm wrong. But I thought it was just pictures of vaginas. No, I think it's literally flowers because it's referenced later in the episode by a different character. Well, even that character could be like so repressed and about all that.
Ronnie: 
There's no, yeah. No, I think the point literally is, again, like that's the reason why, I feel like a book filled with pictures of vaginas would be more educational than... Yeah, it's that hustler. So I learned. But no, I mean, seriously, I feel like that would have been more educational. It wouldn't have been appropriate, but more educational than a picture or a book of flowers. So it's just going to show that Peggy herself didn't get an education on this. That's why she also is uncomfortable
Rob: 
about it or addressing it in any sort of serious way. I want to call it like allegorical which is not the right use of that but do you suppose it's like hey this flower and then the bee comes over and the bee pollinates like is it trying to explain or is it just flowers? It's like a book for people who don't want their kids to learn about this stuff.
Ronnie: 
I don't know. That's the way I took it. Because, yeah, you know, we see Peggy's mom doesn't explain anything to her or anything like that. Doesn't correct her about who her monthly visitor is going to be. It's just, here's what she's going to do.
Rob: 
"Lose flowers, figure it out." - That's funny to think about. I didn't even consider that the book was working the way it was intended to work, right? It's a feature, not a flaw as far as the parents are concerned. It is useless. These are parents who don't want them to learn. Right. And yet there's some kind of, you know, societal pressure. supposed to have the talk about the birds and the bees as a matter of fact so back to pollination yeah yeah i just wonder if it's like well i'm supposed to do this to feel like a good parent but this book gives me an out right i can check this off the list without actually having done the thing you know and you have to assume for these parents it's because they got the same thing that they're trying to pass down to their kid you know it's just a generational thing where nobody knows anything and that's why everybody
Ronnie: 
uncomfortable talking about She seems to recognize that this wasn't helpful. I mean, that's why she's expressing it
KOTH CLIP: 
"I never even kissed a boy until I was 20."
Ronnie: 
laughter detail. Of course he's dead now.
Rob: 
The wording, the delivery, the timing. Oh my gosh. Of course, he's dead now. By the way, 20? I feel like I was a late bloomer with kissing girls and stuff, but even I managed to sneak up.
Ronnie: 
in there before 20. Right. Well, yeah, I guess she's pointing out, hey, this book didn't help because I didn't kiss anybody until... At least I assume that's what she...
Rob: 
she meant something else by it. - Did she meant that the book was part of why she didn't kiss somebody? - Yeah, 'cause she just didn't know anything about this. - Yeah, that her mom's approach was ineffectual, right? - Right. - This is what I remember - Clearly was not great I got problems. At this point, she's, well, like with the question to Luanne about shame, like she is dealing with her own feelings about this subject and recognizing that it is not what it ought to be.
Ronnie: 
change yeah just you know throughout throughout this episode up until this point well hey we learn about uh peggy's first kiss and uh the guy who of course is dead now and then hank comes in you know and and he is not pleased about because there's like you know a woman's womb in this book it's an actual medical book oh yeah and peggy is actually learning to be able to teach this you We have Joseph and Bobby hanging out. You know, we met Joseph in the last episode. They're about to go two for two, by the way, in their...
Rob: 
scenes where it's just the two of them off on their own being boys together. Because in pilot, their scene was awesome and had those impressions. It's so funny. This scene is so good. So, we're in the room and we have Bobby asking Joseph, "You want my Chandler or my Ross?" He's got Friends dolls. He's got Friends dolls.
Ronnie: 
And I could not find Friends dolls. I think that they just made this up. Oh, really? I guess it's possible they existed, right? I guess it's possible I wouldn't find them online necessarily. I don't know. - I feel like I would. Items, right? exist. Friends is so huge now. I figured I would see some of them listening.
Rob: 
- There's money to be made, I think, creating some dolls right now. You know what we had? - What do you have? - Found them at a pawn shop. I had an Edward No. - Jacob. - Jacob. We had 'em like Barbie-sized dolls of, you know, the hottest trio in the history of cinema. - Yeah, and you shot 'em full of BBs, right?
Ronnie: 
What is she going to do? Do you want my Edward or my Jacob?
Rob: 
- Edward or Team Jacob? So which one do you shoot? You know, if you're Team Edward,
Ronnie: 
Jacob I guess? Yeah you'd want to shoot the other guy yeah
Rob: 
Does Joseph say, can I shoot him full of BBs? And he says, yeah. And he goes, well, then Ross. Yeah. Yeah. Bobby's like, okay. He says, then Ross.
Ronnie: 
that's that's one of hannah and my favorite pastime and there's there's some inebriation involved where we'll put friends on and i'll just tear into ross for like an hour straight because i hate that character that guy's a sack of shit i love david schwimmer yeah schwimmer seems cool he plays him great like he's playing him to be that way like he has to be and i love to just tear into ross and i'd shoot him up i don't blame joseph but i just love bobby had friends win that award, but of King of the Hill. So Bobby doesn't care about what happens to his He's gonna be too busy. After I learn sex ed, I'll be too busy dating. Who? I don't know. Whoever wants to have sex with me. Oh, God, this is just so brilliant. Because these are just funny, like, sayings in general, right? Yeah, right. is great because Bobby genuinely is sincere about this. He's like, he's not even saying he's gonna be like this hot shot or anything like that. like, well, I'm growing up and people are going to want to start having sex with me. And I guess I'll have sex with them.
Rob: 
I mean, I, you know, I guess it's a little hyperbolic or whatever for comedic affect. but not a lot, right? It's capturing to be a naive child who kind of hears like, but you don't really know what's coming. So you end up with all kinds of, you know, and wrong ideas about how like i thought i was gonna have like a good job i'll be rich when i grow up i probably thought i was gonna be rich well yeah who didn't everyone on tv is i'm not gonna be yeah By the way, you know... go down this tangent we got so much else to talk about but how about king of the hill single story home which is unheard of on television practically nobody lives in a single story home because you need that stair exit as an option i guess right oh yeah even the conners had a second floor but on roseanne yeah just to be clear yeah notoriously a poor sitcom family yeah yeah working class family so just real brief note another thing i love about king of the hill his parents are and the fact that they are not explaining anything to him about any of this so you're right he's just seeing stuff on tv when he's not watching barney and friends and he's formulating these these thoughts about these things that are completely misguided but he's not being given any sort of guidance yet at least that makes me wonder what joseph's input would be right like we don't get to see what he thinks about what bobby just said i think we move on
Ronnie: 
He's calling and threatening death threats here. have to imagine he's not really giving good guidance. If anything, he's maybe letting Joseph watch some cockroaches breed or something like that to learn what that's all about. So where's Nancy in all this, I wonder? Yeah, I don't know, because I could see Nancy being a responsible parent in that regard and being about, yeah, let Joseph learn something.
Rob: 
I wish we could spend some time at that house on this episode. I do find myself curious. If we're saying, well, one place you find out about these kinds of things is from friends, and obviously that can be misinformation. Oh, God, yeah. I wonder what Joseph has to contribute to Bobby's education on this. Out in the alley, the guys find out that Peggy is subbing for the sex ed class, and they find the bright side. I bet Peggy will be introducing some new ideas into the bedroom.
KOTH CLIP: 
You oughta hit the books too. - What the hell is wrong with you all?
Rob: 
just think you'll be married to a woman who knows everything about sex i love maybe you ought to hit the books dale's really he's just like sitting there he just knows what he's talking about you kind of picks his moments to to pick on hank kind of like fuck with him a little bit right like i don't know she's gonna know everything you better he's giving him a hard time but you know like as soon as if hank was mad at all they would like yeah i'm sorry yeah be startled and flee immediately yeah yeah and here we see bill being a bit different he doesn't seem to have a crush on
Ronnie: 
these characters themselves don't know anything about sex. So I think you're right. Dale is trying to psych Hank out a little bit but I think they are genuine in that oh shit Peggy's gonna learn about this sex stuff she's gonna become an expert at this because they don't know anything it probably is like actually I wonder what the right word is for
Rob: 
like exciting in a way or something yeah it's a um it's like an oddity uh something that's foreign to them you know like oh like it's this whole part of life they've never truly explored or learned about so they're like oh she's learning about all this stuff i love the idea that just because she's learning about sex in a way that she could teach it to students
Ronnie: 
that she's going to be learning all these freaky moves and stuff like that. And then I don't know that Hank... To me, it doesn't seem like Hank buys into this. It doesn't seem like he starts to get a complex about this where he's like, oh, I'm not going to be as good as Peggy in the bedroom. I don't think that Hank buys... into it really.
Rob: 
so I guess I also don't That's what's going on with him. He certainly hates that studying and involved in it.
Ronnie: 
It's like naughty and they're like, oh, we, you know, you shouldn't be talking about that in public because to him, it's like, it's just embarrassing in general.
Rob: 
that scene we got coming up i guess we'll get to it but when she seems to kind of suggest maybe they should you know get it on a bit he really resists that does not like And I wonder if part of a, this is the part that I didn't really think about and I don't know that it's there, but is he feeling like insecure at all? Right? Right. trying to suss out or is it just he doesn't want her to be mixed up in the in the business i don't know or not even mixed up but just that it reflects badly on his family oh yeah oh that's interesting right that's kind of the way i take it is that it's just like oh you're
Ronnie: 
Peg, you don't talk about - I thought this in public kind of thing. You're talking about all this filthy stuff and I gotta take shit in the alley. Yeah, exactly that. I think that's, yeah, it's exactly it. We also mentioned, you know, Hank hurt his back and we see him at multiple points in this episode. He's wearing a, like a back brace kind of thing. Oh, yeah. That he calls a girdle
Rob: 
Oh man, you thought, you know, Like, of course he's dead now is going to be the great line of the show, the episode. the Bobby and of scenes really good this episode just keeps going with home runs so to speak because we go That's exactly right. Yeah, so we're at this baseball game. A good connection to the pilot. You know, we had baseball being a part of that. That's right. And kind of the driving force of that episode. Which, by the way, December? She's grading essays in December? They're playing baseball? I don't think that fits, as far as I know. You know, because I looked at the weather in Houston. 60 year, you know, your winter is, it's cold if it gets below 60. Right, exactly. That I'm saying today is a high of 71, 75 tomorrow. As we record in February. I mean, I distinctly remember being outside playing in a t-shirt and shorts, like when my family was visiting for Christmas. Yeah. So to me, that's,
Ronnie: 
foreign because i'm from the midwest so yeah fuck that shit yeah winter is it's cold time you're not outside playing baseball but that's what they're doing here we have peggy sitting around with some other moms presumably there and they're they're discussing sex you know people know that that peggy And a woman says... - I learned about sex from my mother. She gave me that wonderful book, The Loveliness of Women.
KOTH CLIP: 
That book is worthless. Well, I got a lot out of it. When my husband would crawl all over me at night and do his
Rob: 
Well, I would just close my eyes and think of them pretty flowers. Oh, Bonnie, you poor poor woman. That's horrible. I know which is nice too, right? I don't mean to always be on the lookout She's, as far as US media goes, relatively conservative, right? Texas characters, are they going to have the wrong idea about stuff? You know, like, I don't mean to be on edge about that all the time. But hey, man, that lady just said, I'm a lesbian and I don't know it. And Peggy's response isn't anything other than sympathy. And I like that. I saw a Reddit thread about that today where people were discussing that. And I didn't take it that way, although that is the way that I think is most logical to take it. That she's a lesbian?
Ronnie: 
herself. But I think the lesbian aspect is probably more correct because like hey, you don't... Sex is something that is natural to us, at least to most people, at least, to humans in general. So even if you didn't learn about it, you should be thinking about more than pretty flowers. To me, that sounds like you're trying to mentally escape what is happening. And escape into the imagery of woman. Yeah, that too. Interesting. Oh my gosh, yeah. So we learned a little bit about Bonnie there. I do want to say we have a guest star in this episode, Mary Shear, and MADtv. I assume she's one of the mom on iCarly. - We have the moms talking over there. Robbie, he's sitting on the bench and he has a little conversation of his own. We meet a kid named Dooley.
Rob: 
the greatest thing that's ever happened.
KOTH CLIP: 
- Hey Bobby, your mom's gonna teach
KOTH CLIP: 
Yeah, I know.
KOTH CLIP: 
I'm gonna get to see her boobs.
Rob: 
- So? - Bobby, you're up. - So Bobby goes to bat and Dooley stays. There's another kid. - Your dad lost his job. job we like moved the camera right yeah as it were and there's another kid your dad lost his job i'm gonna see your boobs so so bobby doesn't even like say no he doesn't dispute it he's just like well that's happening and yes so what that's kind of boss that's like that's pretty badass but He's ignorant and naive and We knew that about him.
Ronnie: 
yeah but he's able to just be like he's open-minded you don't bother me you're trying to you're trying to mess with me yeah don't bother me but and that's the thing that goes to duly is it seems like he genuinely thinks that's what's gonna happen is that that's what sex ed is is that you're gonna see the teacher's boobs all of They're all fucked up. They all need it. They all need what Peggy's going to give them. Truly. I love Dooley. He's a character that shows up a lot throughout the show. And voiced by Mike Judge, he's supposed to be this Beavis and Butthead character where he's just an idiot. And that's to fill that role. And I love this character. I'm so glad. So funny. But hey, Bobby goes up to bat and he actually does really well. He actually, he fucking hits it out of the park. - That's right. - He books it to first, Peggy stands up and she's you know don't stop at first you know keep going go to second or whatever And then the kids start giving him shit, because all the kids know that she's going to be teaching sex ed, and they're like, "Oh, yeah." Is she saying, "Go all the way?" Yeah, go all the way. Go all the way. Yeah. So everyone starts giving Bobby shit for this. Bobby kind of... He's running, then he slows down. Still makes it to second, by the way. Again, just a big difference from the previous episode. He must have been giving 140%. In this game. And from there, we cut to the Hills House. The phone rings Hello
KOTH CLIP: 
and if you teach that sick Sid class,
Rob: 
Is that you? Oh, Hank, can I speak with Peggy? Peggy, it's for you. It's Dale. It's Dale. Yellow Dale. You don't know who I am, but I know where you live. It's so stupid. You don't know who I am. Structurally, I love that we've heard that he made a phone call. Yes. And then it comes back around where we actually get to hear it, and it's that funny.
Ronnie: 
different situation. But to us, it's not threatening at all. just so, because we know, I guess because we know who Dale is, but just the fact that he is so stupid. Well, yeah, if I were the original teacher
Rob: 
didn't recognize it as dale right i mean that takes a lot of the threat out of it obviously it was yeah if someone just talked in a weird voice and said like you don't know who i am but if you teach that class you know i'd be like fuck i'm not who knows how psychotic this maniac might be i don't know right yeah maybe i don't teach this class
Ronnie: 
you know I don't need to teach a clock I'd rather not worry about my safety and not all right we are now in Hank and Peggy's bedroom and Peggy has some pretty feet and hands and I looked it up this is an actual like is it kind of lotion yeah and she's She's offering to rub it on hay. and Hank is uncomfortable by this. He doesn't really understand it. He doesn't know what's going on.
Rob: 
it is like you you kind of alluded to is that peggy does kind of seem to be actually trying to introduce some sort of at least fun play into their to their bedroom like hey let me rub this on you oh that's i didn't even think about that that you know all that talk of she's going to become uh an expert in and sex and everything and be a real dynamo in the bedroom is this kind of the peggy hill version of that like she is thinking about sex she's trying to be less repressed and
Ronnie: 
Like, what if we were like, our skin was a little less dry? Like, that's her version of being a real minx. Yeah, I mean, well, I guess compared to whatever it was previous to that. But Hank says, you know, what in the hell are my elbows, like, why do they need to be smooth? And Peggy says, honey, I just thought it would be nice for later for us. to be all smooth and then hey no hank i don't mean to be rude or nothing but i'll pass i'll pass he says that is so cold i'm having a hard time judging if it's because of he's just uncomfortable with this or if he is mad at peggy at the same time so i guess that he's not interested in her touching him, that kind of thing, if he is mad at her.
Rob: 
She's like trying. She's reaching out to him. And really, I mean, her world is, I mean, the moms were supportive, but only because they thought that she wouldn't do the job. They were glad that she was going to be the sub because they that she would somehow like not do it. know, or like do it in a way that they found acceptable. do the flower book or something. But so other than that, like there was some support there, but it was based on a false impression. and then the kids are being mean to Bobby and Dale is calling the house like Peggy is they're like inundated with judgment resistance scorn she turns to her husband for intimacy and he fucking is a dick about it i mean he tried i liked it hank is like huh i'll pass you know i mean he's got a little edge to it but it's not like he said i don't know well he yells at her a
Ronnie: 
Then they go to the topic of her teaching this class and she says, I'm going to teach it like no matter what. Like at this point she feels like it's her duty. I think she's really realizing how fucked up everything is and like how everyone around her besides Luann does not know anything about this stuff and she... recognizes this as a problem. Look, Hank Hill, I did not ask to teach this class, but I am a substitute teacher. That means I have to be prepared to go they need teachers most at any hour of the day or night and teach anything from gym to home ec Oh darn it, excuse me. And if I start to pick and choose, the whole system just breaks down.
KOTH CLIP: 
to pick and choose when you had those Randy Travis tickets. Oh no, those poor little kids never did get to make their clay ash trays.
Rob: 
damn sure gonna know the 18 stages of arousal, 'cause Peggy Hill is gonna teach that class. Hell yeah! It's pretty awesome. I'm slightly disappointed that she makes it about oath as a substitute teacher which is fine but at this point it does seem really clear that she's like this is not the way things ought to be people need to get a better like education and sex than i got than all these people got yeah so like she she does have a larger mission but here she just emphasizes the substitute teacher thing which is you know okay yeah i have to wonder you know how much of that does she even believe i mean ultimately they address that because yeah hank's like well
Ronnie: 
point but yeah you're right it would have been nicer if she'd kind of more bluntly addressed it like nobody here knows a fucking thing about sex and i'm tired of it i wonder though i mean
Rob: 
One strength of the show As far as these kinds of shows, there's some amount of subtlety. And you say that, and what I imagine is, well, that would seem they're like, "Hey audience, do you get what's going on? She sees that this sex education has been a failure so she's gonna, you know? Like if she gets, if that's speech that might be too heavy handed. you do find a way for her to... to kind of hide behind it
Ronnie: 
use what's available to her that will kind of make it easier for her to express what she's trying to do. Yeah, I can see the show being too preachy. You're right, if they actually did go the way that we were kind of wanting. But, you know, to play a Fargo clip kind of summing up what Peggy said. Sir, you have no call to get snippy with me. I'm just doing my job here. I'm just doing my job here. So after that, we get a fun little power struggle in the bed between Peggy and Hank. They're kind of fighting over the comforter. They're kind of pulling it back and forth. So they're angry at each other and it's not in a way It's not in a scary way. We do see they have their disagreements, and here the way it plays out is just by kind of yanking the... The covers back and forth. There's the oh
Rob: 
in life. Just have your own individual If you're sharing a bed, just get your own blankets. It never made any sense to me. It's like anytime one of us moves, it affects the other one. got a closet with some sheets in it and blankets what are we doing yeah we got extra why are we why aren't we using them i guess if you like a pretty like made bed i mean there's a way to do that too we don't bother we're slobs we're slobs yeah because not making your bed makes you a a slob oh i got a list of reasons why we're slobs oh okay yeah let's go down that list
Ronnie: 
Well, hey, after that little power struggle at night, we cut to like a montage of Peggy studying. She's educating herself. Hank is so flushed, he's really taking this out by pruning the like we're going back to that and it's revealed that he cut all the limbs off the tree so now it's just a giant you know i guess what would the word for that be cock
Rob: 
I guess you're right because Bill says it's Freudian. Yeah, you're right. Now at this point, it's completely phallic. Which I wondered, is Bill dropping a Freudian? Is that in Bill's repertoire? I don't know if I buy that, but yeah, you know, hey, you wanted more Bill. We didn't get a lot of them in pilot and we're getting more of them here. My little taste, although he's not, he's not very Billy. Totally. Right. Right. A little bit he is. And I did like having him more. I loved it. He goes, well, Hank, it's a, it's a, I accidentally slid into a
Ronnie: 
Well, hey, um, sings some words she starts off with happiness happiness happiness
KOTH CLIP: 
penis penis
Ronnie: 
- That's Hank spitting out his drink.
KOTH CLIP: 
I just said... I heard you. The whole neighborhood can hear you cussing.
Ronnie: 
- -Cussing, saying... No body parts. Whole neighborhood can hear you cussing. Yeah, I like uvula. Uvula is the thing in the back of your throat. Oh, is it? Yeah, it's not even a sexual term. Coach Powell didn't teach me about the uvula.
Rob: 
parts down there where their parts are. Yeah, uvula, that's funny.
Ronnie: 
even catch it. I mean, look it. Peggy is alone in a room by herself, and she can't even say penis initially. Like, what does that tell you? You know, like, again, she's recognizing this problem. Luckily, she found a way past it i love the huh like the little breath penis penis so funny yeah i mean crazy because they're supposed to be in their uh i think mid to late 30s by the time the show starts here yeah Peggy, regardless, comes out
Rob: 
body part that's a good point right and these in these people's world especially it's like look man that's the word for something that god gave us you ever thought about that hank oh well see hank says it's supposed to be concealed by an undergarment that's why he says you're dealing with organs that people don't want to know about such a funny one
Ronnie: 
Peggy straight up says, Bobby ought to know about him. We don't want him growing up as repressed as we did. So that's the heart of the issue. And that's the heart of the episode, really. But Hank says he's drawing the line. He doesn't want Bobby knowing about this stuff, about these cuss words. to the permission slip hank says permission denied so he goes to bobby and tells bobby that uh bobby's coming to work with him and we go to strickland propane for the first time right but before that i do want to say hank is reading a newspaper oh and it's the arlen courier sports sports is in the title yeah so they don't have the bystander yet i guess yeah that's not established yet but yeah so we go to strickland propane we heard that he sells propane and propane accessories in the
Rob: 
strickland propane meanwhile peggy goes to tom landry middle school tom landry middle school yeah first of all yeah what's that yeah so tell us who's tom landry he's like a sports guy right yeah he's a sports guy you got to look it up to double check because i don't know things but he's
Ronnie: 
coach yeah so the school is named after a fucking coach That is something else. Does that happen? I don't think so. Yeah, so that had to have just been like a play at like how into sports, but not only a football
Rob: 
also a World War II veteran. Oh. So I guess, hey, he's a veteran. Maybe they can... He might have served alongside Cotton. Oh, shit. You're right. Maybe. He's the one with the little pork pie head. want to say, the iconic pork pie hat. Yep, you're right about that. still alive when the show is being made oh i thought you were saying today no no
Ronnie: 
No, he died in 2000. I guess if he were alive... To the course he's dead now. Of course he's dead now. Well, hey, he would be 100 if he were alive today but Peggy gets out of her car with her bag of props I guess oh man and the hits something it starts buzzing yeah she reaches in there and turns it off what is she about to show these kids she went from just saying the word penis and vagina to now she's got a vibrator that she's ready to like talk about is there a cut scene where peggy hill goes to a sex shop or do you does she just ask nancy i guess yeah maybe or does nancy suggest it the thing i know about
Rob: 
I have to wonder if they dealt with that in a deleted scene. I assume it's just a joke, you know, just a quick funny thing to do. It's a great joke, like I think it's funny as heck, but to me it's just like,
Ronnie: 
big job. That to me is like, all right, that's, you don't need to be teaching 11 year olds fucking vibrators like that's - It's not a step too far.
Rob: 
worked with the right vibrator. These kids need to know
KOTH CLIP: 
Washington.
Ronnie: 
hey yeah so we get that little go back to strickland hanks on the phone you know bobby's there he's just bored at work have you
Rob: 
Oh, yeah. I used to go to work. My mom worked at a bank in Houston downtown. Big, long, from the boonies where we live. and up like 16th floor-ish, and I would just knock around that office. One time, I was playing around, doing God knows what, pretending to be a cop or something, probably pretending to be John McClane, fighting the bad guys in Nakatomi Plaza. And there was a way that, this is so weird, but there's the big window overlooking the city, Look, you really... six inches across, like wide, a little, and like a foot and a half or two feet deep. I don't know why you would have that. not describing it well, but like the wall didn't go all the way to the window. Instead, there was a gap between like the end of one wall and the
Ronnie: 
had the window anyway so i was in there sure yeah i knew that's where this was going so i'm in there yeah of course and then some fucking guy this is like office wasn't being used it just had some boxes in or something but then some guy comes in there and starts using the phone and i was like oh oh shit i felt trapped like i couldn't come out right so i just waited and waited and waited for this guy to finish his phone calls oh my god yeah i went to work with my parents a lot actually now having to sit there all day doing nothing. And this is before, you know, cell phones. Well, I cell phones. Maybe I'd have my mom's phone that had like snake on it or blackjack or something. So I totally get Bobby here where he's just like sitting in this chair spinning around like doing nothing. There's nothing for you to do. I do want to point out an OSHA violation office. He has a file cabinet. And something on top of it, I don't know what that might be, but then he has a propane at any minute, even if it's empty. it's gonna be heavy. So I don't know what the deal with that is. And not only that, he knows that he
KOTH CLIP: 
What do you think Mom's telling all those guys?
KOTH CLIP: 
not to think about it.
KOTH CLIP: 
-
KOTH CLIP: 
What do you think Mom's saying to him? I said not to think about it. Think about something else. Okay. Dad, do you ever have sex anymore? Uh, well, uh, come on, Bobby. Can't you think of something...
KOTH CLIP: 
What do you think Mom's taking?
Ronnie: 
Back to the first question. And again, with Bobby, he's not trying to be bad. He's not trying to be anything like it's you can tell it's a genuine like that's what's going through his brain. That's what he wants to know. Doesn't he end up saying Bobby saying that Peggy is like bad for talking about all that stuff? Bobby to Hank says, "I just wanted to say you don't have to worry about me because I'm never gonna have sex." Oh Bobby, don't say that. And then Bobby says, "I thought that's what you wanted." Yeah, so then like well if I had a daughter yeah but you're my son and so then Bobby says why is it not okay for girls but it's okay for boys episode getting into some deep shit here. Hank says it's called the double standard box. Don't knock it. We got the law. yeah i mean that's bobby coming from this place of just ignorance like he just doesn't know he's Like, well, how come... And too earlier in the episode, he's like, well, I'm worried about being a slut. So it's like, well, how come...
Rob: 
girls it's bad yeah we didn't mention at the time but like no one gives a shit if bobby's a slut but he picked up on that that's not a good thing because someone was probably you know accusing a girl right and this sweetheart dummy bobby like doesn't even realize that there is this double standard but bobby takes us as he's like you know i see well that's why mom's bad for talking about Like, I've been caught up in my own stuff, whatever, but, like, that's my wife. That's Peggy. Yeah, like, it's one thing for him to criticize her, but now when he hears his son is thinking that his mom is doing wrong and his mom is bad, it changes for him. Imagine how hard that is for...
KOTH CLIP: 
I had a teacher room full of snickering fifth graders and a girl's, you know, hookups.
Rob: 
That woman's got a lot of guts, I'll tell you what. I really like that. Yeah. I always want everybody to be happy and together. of each other and all that stuff, you know, and Hank was out of sorts, but he, he nails it, right? For one thing, imagine how hard that is for her, right? So there's empathy driving this change of heart, um, as he really thinks through what her experience is and can, you know, once he's thinking about that, then he's not so swept up in his own stuff. He can think about what she's actually
Ronnie: 
well, he can't do it. Like, he couldn't talk to Bobby about this stuff. So, like, that's pretty badass that she's not only prepared to teach Bobby about it, but that she's, like, Hank can't even talk to his own son about this. Right. But Peggy now is tasked with teaching. entire class of about this and so he's really now realizing how great she is for doing that i mean ultimately she's doing this for the community and she's providing a service to the community and and hank gets it so by the way presumably because that quality is kind of like a defining trait of who peggy is right that toughness and she she does what she believes is right and all that kind of thing that's got to be something that hank has loved about her appreciates about her so you know there with Bobby and Peggy that means so much to her to have Hank And they exchanged some words. And this is what gives Peggy a confidence in a footwork. knowing specifically Hank is behind her on this, that she's not this rogue entity on this mission. Now Hank supports her, her husband supports her. So first of all, she asked the students, all right, into it. I need you all, you know, to hand in your permission slips. Every single kid gets up and walks out. And they're sad. They're like, you know, sorry, Mrs. Hill. If they don't have the permission slip, they have to go,
Rob: 
So they all leave. They all get up and leave, except for Bobby. I do like that they're like, "Sorry." don't want to just their goddamn parents are getting in the way yeah i love this You know, it is, it's Peggy's character and then Hank's empathy and recognizing her strengths. changes his mind and leads him to bring Bobby and that support is what and why they're good together and the fact that they love you. is like that an awful lot. Yeah, that's so awesome. Stories can go all kinds of ways, they are and how they feel about each other. That is how the story resolves. Yeah, so it's just Bobby in the classroom. Just him and Peggy. Looks like it's just you and me, Mom. Okay, son. Well, let's begin with the difference between boys and girls. You mean the penis? Yes, the penis. Last time he said you mean the penis she had to leave. Yep. Yeah.
Ronnie: 
arc there, right? Like, it's like full circle. And not only that, but the journey Peggy goes through just to ultimately teach her son. Like, the classroom, the school didn't have to be a part of any of this. That's right. All of this was a means for her literally to be able
Rob: 
about these things. That's right. Just go full circle back to what she tried to do in the bedroom with Bobby. weird way to put it i guess didn't like how that was unspooling well hey i
Ronnie: 
I know what you meant. And it's funny because, you know, if Peggy could have just talked to Bobby this way initially, then she might not have even wanted to do the substitute teaching thing. You know what I mean? Like, maybe then she would have just been happy saying, oh, I'll just teach my son and that'll be it.
Rob: 
hands of it, right? We don't have to worry about this because we've got Bobby covered. Right. Yeah. Yeah. The starting point was like, fuck, we can't. and be the kind of parents that we apparently think we should be able
Ronnie: 
So that's not the end of it. The episode ends, you know, we get more of a resolution with Peggy and Hank. whatever peggy comes and sees hank and uh hank reveals that luann and bobby are out of the house he paid for them to go see a double feature pretty fucking confident yeah oh for sure double feature
Rob: 
Oh, Hank. Double trouble for Hank. Like, I sent the kids to go watch a commercial break. I was going to say, like, an 11-minute episode of Aqua Teen or something.
Ronnie: 
- The kids are watching one of the Super Bowl commercials, if you wanna. - Yeah, so Hank queues up the rank course was name dropped earlier that's right and they start kind of dancing to it or whatever hank falls down because of his back right he still has these back a running theme throughout the episode. And they're on the ground and they're laughing and giggling down there on the ground and the phone rings.
KOTH CLIP: 
Hello. You have reached the Hill residence. Please leave a message at the tone. You don't know who I am, but I know where you live. teacher and you better cut it out if you know what's good for you.
Ronnie: 
Oh, and Hank, we changed that tee-off time to 3 o'clock. See you. What the fuck? I love, so Dale's calling in to threaten the sex ed teacher, but ultimately all she did was teach Bobby.
Rob: 
Yeah, well, and he says you better cut it out, but it's done, right? It seemed like it was a one-time thing, right? Like, it doesn't have to be a reoccurring class, I don't think. What if she has to teach Bobby alone in a classroom for, like, a week solid? That'd be pretty cool if it was, like, you were the only student and your mom was a teacher. That'd be pretty relaxed.
Ronnie: 
I don't know about that.
Rob: 
Okay, you're right. Given that amount of time, she's definitely getting to vibrators, though. So at least she's prepared. Yeah, I guess Bobby's getting the full treatment.
Ronnie: 
an ongoing thing, but no, I have to think Bobby would not want that because imagine, okay, imagine you're in school and sex addict except for the one kid whose mom is teaching the class and he's in there alone with his mom like every single day i'd be like what the fuck that's so bizarre i think that kid would get picked on that would define him for the rest of his life at that school with those kids yes yeah I think it's okay. You know, all the kids are sad.
Rob: 
I don't think they'd make fun of Bobby for staying. - No, they'd probably be jacked.
Ronnie: 
What'd she teach you? Julie would be like, what were her boobs like? But yeah, if Yeah, no, just I love the way that they bring that Dale thing back. I do want to say I don't want to get into details, but I will. more or less double featured once before I was given some money to get out of the house. that's all I'll say. So it's pretty sweet. It's like, Hey, here's some money. Get the fuck out of here. It's like, okay.
Rob: 
As far as I know, my mom... might have given me money to stay home i think don't i don't want you out there doing drugs or nothing i'm like i'm gonna go hang out at paul's house she's like uh don't why don't you stick around huh i'll pay you to stay home that's your stay stay here and watch tv i'll let you
Ronnie: 
Well, I like the way that Hank and Peggy are getting intimate here. I mean, that sounded weird, so... - I do see from time to time on King of the Hill, that Peggy and Hank get a little horny sometimes, which to me, it doesn't come across as gross or anything.
Rob: 
- Oh my gosh, it's just human. - That would totally chase.
Ronnie: 
weird. Right. So, to me, it's just... They're kind of giggling, they're on the floor laughing
Rob: 
assume one thing leads to another. And I like how he's got, like, no game, you know? you're right it's like well while we're here huh you get what i'm saying my saddle's waiting oh i love the randy travis by the way you know growing up in texas country is the soundtrack to a lot of what you a lot of your life and Travis specifically just has such a great voice.
Ronnie: 
Oh, yeah, and he goes on to show up in an episode later on, which is a lot of fun. That is something I like about this show.
Rob: 
is around.
Ronnie: 
Yeah. So, you know, before we head out, I want to ask you, because this episode is about substitute... and it's about having to cover a class that you're maybe uncomfortable with. Would you ever run into situations like this where you would be asked to sub a class that you didn't know anything about or that you particularly didn't like or... a checklist of things that Rob can...
Rob: 
When I was subbing in the public school district here, it was just they would call. you be like do you want to teach at this school it's this class and you just say yes or no and it had nothing to do i'm sure there were like elite subs or the better subs who had been around for a And they would get requests by teachers who maybe knew they could do a little bit more than some rando, but I was just a hired gun dude who would show up and do whatever, which was my
Ronnie: 
just take attendance and sit at the desk while they did worksheets or something. Sure. Yeah. Like, I didn't teach nothing as a sub. Which, you know, you would think is usually the case, right? But with this situation, the teacher quit the class, so they, like, needed somebody to actually teach it, not just to fill in for a day while somebody was out sick or whatever.
Rob: 
Yeah, I honestly, I can't remember teaching a single thing ever. I watched the two teachers. I can't remember. I really do remember. you're just a babysitter.
Ronnie: 
as a student, I remember whenever we had a sub, I don't remember them actually really teaching unless maybe the teacher was out for like a long period of time. situation. But if it's just like, sub for a day. Yeah, that's really, it's just like movie or it's been
Rob: 
or something, yeah. maternity leave and we had a long-term sub. And I think she made have a background in English and was selected because she could cover that class specifically. And she told me I was a good writer and that really fucked me over because then I was like, okay, well, I'll do that with my life. And it turns out that's hard. Oh no. If only she said that you sucked at writing. Yeah. If only she had been like, you're a good engineer. Then I could be an engineer.
Ronnie: 
Yeah, exactly. Yeah.
Rob: 
you know?
Ronnie: 
- Besides Ryder, she was off on that, but anything else she told you, spot on about. Well, hey, we can head on over to our quiz bowl now. We have some questions for each other this episode and last time, I'll let you go first. I have a few So the difficulty of my question will be predicated upon the difficulty of your question.
Rob: 
wonder what you're gonna ask i don't i don't it could be anything i feel like on the way to the dairy farm Hank's taking Bobby. We get a little shot of them in the car driving down the road through town and Hank's saying like, there used to be a dairy farm. They drive by a fast-food chain that Texans pretend is good even though fucking place loves to put mustard on their burgers instead of mayonnaise, which I... Don't like. Oh. What is the fast food chain? Dude, I just simply do not know. And I thought that would be too hard. I don't mean to throw that at you.
Ronnie: 
because honestly I can barely even remember that scene it goes by in a flash yeah it's got to be a quick one yeah I don't know what is it what - I didn't have to say that, god damn it. that's one of the biggest regrets of my life. But I was like, is that even a real burger? Yeah, believe it or not, it is. Oh my god, no, for real, I was about to say that. So I'm at least somewhat satisfied with myself that I was going to get it. but I was too shy to say it. Rob, you're a sports hunk. We were talking about sports earlier. Bobby has two sports posters on his wall in his bedroom.
KOTH CLIP: 
.
Rob: 
What is the sport? Oh, I just need the sport? Yeah. I don't know. But I'll just guess for...
Ronnie: 
Football. Basketball.
Rob: 
Is it really basketball, my favorite sport? Yeah, I almost gave it away.
Ronnie: 
It's almost like we were just talking about you playing basketball What sport did Bobby? I almost fucking blew it. basketball posters and I went back to Pilot Huh. Kind of interesting that he's got basketball posters on his wall because he plays baseball. They talk about football in the house. Right. But he's got basketball posters on his wall. I don't know if it's supposed to be a specific player or not.
Rob: 
Well, I would love to find out.
Ronnie: 
You're like, I got to see this basketball stuff. Anytime basketball is involved, I gotta see it. Well, hey, on to some closing thoughts. I know, again, I started last time. pilot, so what did you think about this episode, Rob? Well, I do, I, you know, joke's
Rob: 
substitute teachers, endorsements, or otherwise, I still think of myself no matter how that goes. grave thinking that I think I can write something. And so watching an episode like this, you know, a couple of structural things, like the call coming back around, right? you struggle to talk to Bobby and say penis early and then she's able to say it later so structurally good things that stuff about it being character driven story driven funny delivery and all the other stuff that makes the show so fun and good just a really well-written episode and i appreciate that i i want to be spending time with with good writing that i still like because a lot of good writing i couldn't give a fuck about but uh so i tell you what it's writers are the usual guys and this guy Joe Stillman. Did you look into him at all? No. He wrote Shrek. He's one of the- Damn! One of the four people So you know how it goes, like who knows what that means Yeah, how many iterations into it that he did or whatever. Yeah, like he took a pass, who knows. But he was the only one of those four on the original Shrek who also is credited on Shrek 2. something then yeah yeah he's got something going for him shrek wise in the old swamp and then he uh he uh co-wrote and Budhead to America with Mike Judge and somebody else, which that... Quoting some lines from, "I see you wear a bracelet." I wear braces too. great film we'll have to cover it at some point and then he also an episode of Pete and Pete, and I was curious if that's a, the adventures of Pete and Nickelodeon show starring Danny Tamburelli and I won't think of the other guy's name Michael and who was one of in "Home Alone." But anyway, and they play brothers, they're both named Pete, and it's kind of got surreal elements. is little Pete's imaginary friend, already the strongest man in the world. So Pete and Pete's kind of a cool little cult show from before you were born, maybe. I don't know quite what the timing is. And this guy, Joe Stillman, wrote on that. So interesting career. Go, you know, Pete and Pete and Beavis and Bethead I would say like cult stuff.
Ronnie: 
Shrek 2. You don't get more mainstream. Yeah, for real. No kidding. I never knew that there was a connection between Beavis and Butthead and Shrek like that. Me neither. For context, for you, Rob, and for our listeners here, is that in my home, we have
Rob: 
a Shrek banner of Shrek Lane there, and it says, it's my swamp now. We have that in our living room. We had a Shrek-themed party a couple years ago, and we just kept it up. We just loved it. So Shrek, very beloved, as well as King of the Hill. And so, good for Joe Stillman. I give it one out of one penises. One out of one ovaries. Yes. One out of one uvulas. One out of one uteruses. And one out of one vaginas.
Ronnie: 
I mean, not to get ahead of myself here, but this episode is so much deeper than I right like i didn't appreciate these things until we talked about it today because to me it's just oh it's a funny episode peggy's uncomfortable about sex she has to teach it to a class and bobby says funny stuff like i just love this episode because of that initially but you really appreciate how it really is a breaking of again not a generational trauma i mean i guess maybe it led to some traumas but a generational let's say incompetence or ignorance that have been passed down in this community it's a community-wide thing it's a goddamn epidemic right for real like think particularly deeply about sex other than oh it's just something you do I get or whatever like however shallow their thinking is mm-hmm Peggy recognizes these things and she does something about it, which is awesome. And, you know, you touched the structural things that we noted that I never appreciated. Like, you know, I didn't really think about how it starts off when Bobby talks about a penis, Peggy freezes up and walks out of the room while it ends, you know, with them doing that again today. calling it's so fucking stupid and so funny it is funny by the way i think about that you know
Rob: 
is this thing a palindrome? Because the first thing is Peggy rubbing, I mean, it's in her in the office, but if we can kind of skip that real quick, because that pretty quickly becomes Hank calling her so that she's rubbing that icy hot on his aching back. And then the last thing is they are back together, back in physical contact. And whereas before, you know, Hank turned that into some kind of awkward thing. Once Bobby comes here, we've gotten rid of Bobby and he gets
Ronnie: 
yeah i mean look it's nothing new i'm just gonna want to reiterate it's so good you really you podcasted about it twice you can't get enough of it it's the best i know it's so good so hey thanks for listening to us talk about square peg you can find us over at yep podcast.com that's how you can support the show get the full episodes all that good stuff but you know not Next time we're talking about
KOTH CLIP: 
"Order of the Straight Arrow." This trip is about the sacredness of Mother Earth and all she gives us.
Ronnie: 
'cause once we're on the road, we ain't stopping. - In a way, I'm realizing now, kind of similar to SquarePix, because we will see in that episode that they do this order of the straight arrow because their dads take them to it when they're kids. Oh, yeah. And now they're doing it to them. - I bet they were fucked up.